here's looking at you kid.

there's a porno playing,
adding background noises
to my 2 am thoughts.
and it's hard to say
it's hard to put my finger on.
and every once in a while,
when i wake up.
and step into the morning light,
it gets hard to breathe
there's a moisture in the air and it's killing me
but there's a smile in your eyes and it's giving me breath.
i'm still having a hard time
believing your well-thought words
and i'm still having a hard time
think of the right ones to say,
i'm seeing yellow
it's different,
not better
not worse,
just
different
i'm choking on my words
and i hope you'll believe me
when i feign sincerity.
it's a smuggler's den
and the only way there is the cave in.